Well, Christmas is approaching and I am a real GRINCH this year.

This PC (Politically Correct) world of ours is really screwed up. Remember when the motto was "Keep the Christ in Christmas"? You know, the argument of Christmas versus Xmas.

Well, let's keep the Xmas in Xmas! Enough of this "Happy Holidays" crap.

Ok, let's approach this sanely: The Thanksgiving Macy's Day Parade. Oops, we're gonna sidetrack here: WHY IS IT THE MACY'S DAY PARADE? IT'S THANKSGIVING FOR GOD'S SAKE! ! ! Oh wait, we can't put God into it. FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!! Oops, I did it again... FOR PETE'S SAKE!!! (Pete who?)

Oh, on that topic, unlike the other Bob Columns, I am going to copy something I didn't write from an E-mail into a web page. Here is the link: Click Here then come back and finish this column!

And Thanksgiving... WHO ARE WE THANKING? The Almighty God of your choice.... except that we are supposed to deny God in the USA. And, I guess it was OK for our Pilgrim ancestors, whom we revere, to celebrate a Thanksgiving feast to their God, with Native Americans (Opps, too PC... INDIANS) at their feast and table, regardless of their God(s)!!!!!! But that's another rant.

OK back to the point.

So here is the Thanksgiving parade, in a lot of cities in the USA. And WHO culminates the parade? Who is at the VERY end of every parade? Why Santa Claus himself! Good ole St. Nick.

"Santa Claus" derives from the Italian Santa Nicolas. St. Nick... A SAINT! So why does he sit in his sleigh convering all the miles on Broadway shouting "HAPPY HOLIDAYS!"????

SANTA: IT'S "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" ! ! ! ! ! !

See, it's OK to have Santa in his red outfit, up on a sleigh pulled by 8 reindeer, but he can't say "MERRY CHRISTMAS". Noooooo. . . The phrase might offend our non-Christmas celebrating fellow Americans. Santa won't be offensive, but what he says will!

S T U P I D ! ! !

And for those who want God out of our government buildings, and the Pledge of Allegiance, and OFF OUR MONEY(?), this nation was populated by God worshipers and our Constitution, which was built on every human right, was written by God fearing literate CHRISTIANS! And THAT government lead the USA to be the most successful, fruitful, affluent nation that ever existed. It's that religious Christian philosophy, upon which this country was built, that gives the atheists, terrorists and anarchists the freedom of speech to advocate the removal of God from the USA!

By extension, it means that to REMAIN loyal to our Constitution... KEEP CHRISTMAS IN CHRISTMAS!

Now, for another example of stupity...

After all the talk about separation of church and state and the comments above, you wouldn't expect this:

I am working on a communications project with Customs and Border Protection Bureau of the Department of Homeland Security for my employer. We have had problems getting our new AIX computer to send data to Customs using IBM's MQ product. So I have a consultant and a Customs rep on conference calls all day. The Customs rep puts us on hold so she can check with someone about the message queues. On hold, we are entertained by some mellow smooth jazz piano music. (Remember the date is December 17th.) And what is the song?.... "AWAY IN A MANGER" ! ! ! ! Decidedly a Christian CHRISMAS SONG ! ! ! ! (Remember, of which I APPROVE!)

OK, USA... LET'S MAKE UP OUR MIND.... If it's Happy Holidays, it can't be Away in a Manger! A double standard if I ever heard one.

Now, about SECULAR Christmas:

One of our local Long Island Radio Stations, B103, was asking for the worst Christmas songs of all time, from GRANDMA GOT RUN OVER BY A REINDEER to THE MONSTER'S CHRISTMAS. But here is my nomination:

Why? Well, let's look at the scene. The kid gets up Christmas Eve night and peeps at the tree to see Santa. What does he see? His mother sitting on Santa's lap, kissing him! Dad is NOWHERE in sight and Mommy's making out with the Big Guy.

Now what can we deduce from this? Well, 2 things:

1.) Mommy was cheating on Daddy and was cheating with Santa (or a Santa imposter).
-or-
2.) Mommy and Daddy were into some REALLY STRANGE KINKY role playing! Costumes and all!

Where was Daddy? No where to be found! On a business trip or in the Santa suit. And what lacy frilly little slutty outfit was Mommy wearing anyway?

Apparently Mommy does this a lot, cause the kid says in the lyric,

"What a laugh it would have been, if Daddy had only seen Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night"!

The kid is USED to Mommy kissing other men! And Daddy would have laughed! SWINGERS?

I leave this question to be answered by you, the reader.

MERRY CHRISTMAS